I'm Just A Stupid Girl!

One Saturday, when I was working the part time country convenience store job, a slightly scruffy looking, late 20's early 30's couple came in and headed toward the automotive supplies. After a minute or two the man started walking back in the direction of my post behind the counter and said, "Do you have any...." (took one look at me) "Oh, you wouldn't know." It has always amazed me to think a person would make assumptions about what I do or do not know just by seeing my face. I've often wondered if I had a "STUPID" tattoo on my forehead that was only visible to others. I was pretty sure that (in his shallow mind) my lack of a penis severely hindered my ability to answer his question. Despite the fact that I am just a stupid girl, I figured I would humor him a little and find out what it was that I couldn't possibly have known. This is how the conversation went:

Me: What are you looking for?

Scruffy Moron: I need some 2 in1 oil.

Me: You mean 3 in1 oil?

SM: Yeah. That's what I need.

(I take him and the lucky little lady over to the 3 in 1 oil and hand him a can)

SM: No, I need the oil that you mix with gas for a chainsaw.

Me: You want two-cycle engine oil.

SM: Yeah. That's what I want.

To the other end of the isle we went, I handed him the oil and (unable to stop myself) sweetly said, "For a chainsaw you need to mix 2 1/2 ounces of oil per gallon of gasoline, but if you're going to put the saw through heaver than normal use, you might want to use 3 1/2 ounces of oil instead. The saw will smoke a little more and you will loose a little power, but it will keep the engine better lubricated." Resisting the urge to finish it up with, "You ignorant A-hole!" He just mindlessly nodded his head. Another satisfied customer.

Twenty some years ago a wise man told me that he admired my ability to use diplomacy in order to tell someone to go to Hell without them even realizing it until an hour or so later. I'm still at it, John.